“Anything with teeth has potential,” was my standard response when people, with outstretched hands, would pose that question in regard to my pound and a half furry kids. Just to be clear, squirrel monkeys have teeth like rows of straight pins…and you get punctured by four rather nasty canine teeth before the little ones even make contact.

So it’s interesting that people would assume that, just because they are relatively tiny, squirrel monkeys would not chomp on anyone by whom they feel threatened. Hmmmm…..

However, in monkey language there is a definite term for “Back off!! NOW!!” It is a shriek that should curdle the blood of the most fearless among men…and yet….some folks are just language-challenged, I guess.

But a little-known defense mechanism of squirrel monkeys is that, when nervous or frightened, they seem to get an immediate case of diarrhea…which has an odor that, rivalling a skunk’s scent, will surely fend off a would-be attacker. Amazing what can emanate from such a small being! I used to carry towels for my own self-defense purposes as I was the one usually carrying Kong, Mo, or Edith Anne when the impulsive people would descent. Phew!!! (And monkey “business” does not otherwise really smell bad.)

So if you have occasion to meet a squirrel monkey, first ask “Does he/she bite?” before reaching out what will likely be interpreted as a potentially threatening hand. Certainly, heed a scream, especially when accompanied by bared teeth (remember the canine/straight pin one-two punch). And, just in case, you might want to invest in a set of nose plugs!

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