If my aunt had wheels, she’d be a teacart. If a bullfrog had a hip pocket, he could carry an automatic (explanations for “if-then” propositions).
Watch your mouth! I can’t; my nose is in the way (exchange between a former client and her daughter).
I’d stand on my head and stack BBs if I thought it would help (from a former client, expressing her frustration).
The Brussels sprout (in reference to my Belgian friend).
Better to owe it to you than to cheat you out of it (my first husband’s philosophy).
Knee high to a grasshopper (an oldie; don’t know who to credit).
You have a good memory, but it’s short (so I’ve been told).
The more the cry, the less you pee (said to spoiled-brat me by my mom’s stepmom…which was not a threat to a child who hated outhouses).
Prematernity top (in reference to clingy sleeveless shell sweater, compliments of my high school boyfriend).
No. It comes in through the walls and goes out through the floor (my response to a telmarketer asking “Do you have problems with water in your basement?” when my basement at the time in my very old house consisted of a curb wall and a dirt floor).
Not as long as other people get paid (response to smart-aleck guys back in the 70s trying to embarrass me by asking if I believed in free love).